Skip to main content

Minions Review




What I liked: I think my favorite part of the movie was the opening showing the villains the minions have worked for throughout history. Unfortunately most of this was included in the trailer, but it was still funny. The other part I liked was when the mad scientist is giving the minions their gadgets for the upcoming heist. I think it is essentially the same scene as Muppets from Space, or really Oceans 11-13 or any other heist movie, but involving minions, and ridiculous ‘60s talk. That’s pretty much it. There were a few moments of parody or slap stick that landed well but those two scenes were about the best the movie had to offer, except one line describing the minion as “a small, bald, jaundiced child”.  Mostly I’m just glad that it was a double feature with inside out, otherwise I would have been really disappointed with the evening.
What I didn’t: The most tragic thing about this movie, besides that I went to see it in a theater, is that the minion chaos has been lost. If you recall from the other two Despicable installments, Minions are maddness. We are never quite sure why Gru has them. Possibly it is a sign of his ineptness at being a villain; maybe it is an indication of his good heart that he loves absurd cuddly creatures. Whatever the reason, Minions clearly do more harm than good and their antics are chaotic and comical. This has been destroyed. They have a purpose. There is a goal (and, far worse, since it is a childrens Hollywood movie, we already know the goal is accomplished). There is semi-rational thought. There is attempted character development. What was once a wonderful instrument of mayhem, to allies by misadventure, to enemies by sheer chance, has been harnessed and so loses its charm. Unfortunately, all the character development and creativity this movie had to offer was misdirected towards the undevelopable minions. This leaves our super villain, Scarlet Overkill, sadly flat, empty, boring, and unevil. There was potential for all varieties of villain: bumbling and inept like Gru or Megamind, delightfully evil and destructive like Darth Vader, actually evil and effective like no super villain in history. None of these were selected. Apparently, no plan at all was contrived. She oscillates between coercive like Gothel in Tangled, absolutely useless mastermind like Ocean in Ocean’s 11, and sob story gag gag villain like most times people try to give a villain a backstory. There are no moments of devilish plotting, instead we get some stilted speech about women can be super villains too. Which could have carried some kind of forced weight if her whole goal was not to become a frilly princess.
Who should watch this: probably very small children who resemble minions themselves

Would I watch it again? Nope.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Titanic

What I liked: Liked is definitely the wrong word for it but the scenes of the sinking of the Titanic were masterful. They were technologically impressive, apparently remarkably accurate, and emotionally gripping. The variety of ways in which different people dealt with a completely hopeless situation was both touching and thought provoking. Especially beautiful was the string quartet. In isolation from the love story, the sinking of the Titanic is a tragic reminder of the cost of hubris and the necessity of regulating emergency procedures and capacities. It carries similar gravitas as a war film. At the 25th anniversary of the film, I can appreciate how Titanic has impacted movies made later.  What I didn't: So here's the thing. I feel very bad for you if you died in the sinking of the Titanic. I feel less bad for you if you managed to get on a lifeboat on the Titanic and then decided to get off. I question all of your decision making and priorities if you decide to get off a...

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them Reveiw

What I liked: For a movie based on what is in essence a fictional encyclopedia, this movie has a surprising amount of plot. Not great plot, but more than I usually get from reading an alphabetical reference book. I liked the dopey sidekick, his facial expressions were great and he was the only one who acknowledged that what happening on screen was not actually normal. I liked that the president led the tiny army of US wizards to their tiny battle in a subway. So as military victories go, this was not one for the history books, for many reasons. But it did lend more meaning to the phrase Commander in Chief. I felt like Dr Who was once again a bow tie wearing socially awkward guy who lives in a box that is bigger on the inside. Some of the creatures were cool but the CGI didn't quite make them alive. I liked the sloth monkey, I don't really know who it was or what it was doing but I would support a slothmonkey planet of the apes crossover. I like that the guy from SWAT has fina...

Clear and Present Danger Review

What I liked: it's the Jack Ryan character, he's pretty cool. That's really all this movie has going for it. Oh and the old school hacking. That was fun. What I didn't: it was boring. Boring boring. It took me three sessions to get through it. If I turn on a movie while folding laundry or grading, it has a good 30-45 minutes to get me interested enough to keep watching, that should be more than enough to get past the plot set up to the for stuff. If a film can't grab me in that time, there is a problem. Blah blah evil president, corrupt spies, bad guys. Been there, seen that done better. Also this is medium in Ryan's career, he is acting director of the CIA, should he really be running around asking under machine gun fire? I mean I like me some good explosions but maybe after all this time in  the CIA he would have meet at least one friend who is trustworthy and could come on adventures with him. If there is no other trustworthy decent agent in the CIA...