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Minions Review




What I liked: I think my favorite part of the movie was the opening showing the villains the minions have worked for throughout history. Unfortunately most of this was included in the trailer, but it was still funny. The other part I liked was when the mad scientist is giving the minions their gadgets for the upcoming heist. I think it is essentially the same scene as Muppets from Space, or really Oceans 11-13 or any other heist movie, but involving minions, and ridiculous ‘60s talk. That’s pretty much it. There were a few moments of parody or slap stick that landed well but those two scenes were about the best the movie had to offer, except one line describing the minion as “a small, bald, jaundiced child”.  Mostly I’m just glad that it was a double feature with inside out, otherwise I would have been really disappointed with the evening.
What I didn’t: The most tragic thing about this movie, besides that I went to see it in a theater, is that the minion chaos has been lost. If you recall from the other two Despicable installments, Minions are maddness. We are never quite sure why Gru has them. Possibly it is a sign of his ineptness at being a villain; maybe it is an indication of his good heart that he loves absurd cuddly creatures. Whatever the reason, Minions clearly do more harm than good and their antics are chaotic and comical. This has been destroyed. They have a purpose. There is a goal (and, far worse, since it is a childrens Hollywood movie, we already know the goal is accomplished). There is semi-rational thought. There is attempted character development. What was once a wonderful instrument of mayhem, to allies by misadventure, to enemies by sheer chance, has been harnessed and so loses its charm. Unfortunately, all the character development and creativity this movie had to offer was misdirected towards the undevelopable minions. This leaves our super villain, Scarlet Overkill, sadly flat, empty, boring, and unevil. There was potential for all varieties of villain: bumbling and inept like Gru or Megamind, delightfully evil and destructive like Darth Vader, actually evil and effective like no super villain in history. None of these were selected. Apparently, no plan at all was contrived. She oscillates between coercive like Gothel in Tangled, absolutely useless mastermind like Ocean in Ocean’s 11, and sob story gag gag villain like most times people try to give a villain a backstory. There are no moments of devilish plotting, instead we get some stilted speech about women can be super villains too. Which could have carried some kind of forced weight if her whole goal was not to become a frilly princess.
Who should watch this: probably very small children who resemble minions themselves

Would I watch it again? Nope.
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