Terrible Plan! Movie Reviews

What I liked: Cars are pretty useful and I like to learn about them. Every time I see a fast and furious movie I learn many new things about cars that I never knew before. For example, I learned that you can mount a fighter jet engine that shoots blue flames on that back of you car remote controlled. I learned that if you drive really really fast through a mine field the mines will just blow up the car behind you and that mines have very large visible red buttons so you know if your car is about to fall on one. I learned that you can take your car bungee jumping and that if you drive at full speed off a cliff a passing jet can pick you and your car up without changing its flight trajectory. I learned that you can drive a giant electromagnet with no negative functional consequences from driving an electromagnet. I learned that there must be a specialized car rental place that carries bullet proof sports cars and tanks so that you can have the same car on multiple continents without the ...

What I liked: There were monsters. The monsters smashed things. Lots of things. The smash building things, and boat things, and airplane things, and tunnel things so we have all areas of the planet covered. The monsters smashed each other. There were bright colorful lights and music. There was no singing to summon a giant moth. So pretty much this is everything you have ever wanted in a monster movie.  What I didn't: I feel that when developing a giant mechanical monster there are a few things to consider. First, lab placement. I would recommend that R&D for the giant mechanical monster not be located in major cities with large populations like, for example, Hong Kong. This is important for several reasons 1) available realestate. You will need a very large hanger to build a robot the size of, say Godzilla, and your budget will cover much more if you choose somewhere in the middle of nowhere where land prices are much lower. 2) If, each time you test your giant robot monster, y...

What I liked: I liked the friendship that developed between the main characters. I like to believe that they had the same resolving interactions as were in the movie. I liked the trade craft when we got to see it, much less flashy than in fiction films but apparently effective. I like that the probability of me ever ending up in a Russian prison is very very low. Kind of like the probability of me ever being on a nuclear submarine. These are both things that I very much want to avoid. I also liked that, probably in keeping with history, there were more than two spies in the movie. Admittedly, it did look a bit unbalanced East vs West but I did appreciate that there were spies, plural, and some degree of counter intelligence.  What I didn't: Is that really how you get recruited to the CIA? It seems awfully...mundane and risky. Like maybe they contact you first with someone who isn't in charge of the Europe office. I also think it is quite risky to have very high ranking intellig...

What I liked: Gonzo and Pepe spend the night in a haunted mansion. They have run ins with singing ghosts. What more could a person want in a surprise Halloween special? I look forward to the ghost songs making it into the rather thin Halloween playlists. I must say that a mansion haunted by Muppets is substantially less menacing than one haunted by more malevolent ghosts. The ghost bride did a good job of being creepy though. I liked that Gonzo's outfit matched the doorman's. What I didn't: Old Gonzo. That should not have happened. Old Gonzo is creepy looking. Fozzie tells jokes. His jokes are always terrible. I also thought that the other Muppets' jokes were a lamer than I would have hoped. I would have been happier with the movie if it were less transparently the rebranding of the Haunted Mansion ride. Like maybe they didn't need every single element of the ride shoehorned into the movie; maybe there could be some parts of the ride that didn't appear in the mo...

 What I liked: Awkwafina. She made a great friend/sidekick. She was funny and had very relatable reactions. I liked the bus fight. You often meet interesting people on public transit, I have yet to meet a machete armed assassin, but it seems like just a matter of time honestly. I liked the mythical creatures, they were impressive and cute depending on the type. I'm not totally convinced about the moving bamboo maze, it seems cool but also like you could easily sneak past it in an airplane or hang glider or something. I think all the Avengers should go out for karaoke, it could be the new shawarma. I liked the tie in to Ironman 3, but it got a bit too silly for my by the end.  What I didn't: I have to side with Awkwafina, going into hiding and creating a new identity that is only tonally shifted from your original name is not a great way to stay hidden. Neither is using your awesome fighting skills to go viral. Also if you have a whole army of cool assassins does it really matt...

What I liked: I liked Guy. That is in fact the point but I like how happy, carefree, and wholesome he is in what is essentially Grand Theft Auto. I like what the NPCs decide to focus on as they achieve consciousness. I liked the ridiculous YouTubers getting all philosophical about Guy and how he radically changed game play. I liked that so much of the game economy was about silly skins, just like a real game, and how that completely confused the NPCs. I liked the fight between Dude and Guy and its resolution, it managed to stay very on theme. The item cameos were fun, like seeing the Portal gun, or the Fortnite piñata. I liked guy finding the med kit and building up an inventory.  What I didn't: I am not be a lawyer but I am suspicious that there maybe more efficient ways of obtaining evidence of copyright violation than playing 12 hours of a computer game every day. With that in mind I think the evidence points to the heroine enjoying the game far more than she lets on. On the top...

What I liked: I did like the ridiculous museum heist at the beginning and while the sneaking, prying, and stealing were impressive, what I was most astounded by was the extremely fast costume change. Also, if you were afraid that the puns you knew and loved from the original ride would be lost, do not despair! There are puns. Lots of puns. The jaguar fight was pretty cool, I mean who hasn't wanted to watch the Rock wrestle a jaguar? I liked the canoe elevator, impractical and surrounded by very poorly conceived attempts at redemption (I mean who came up with that and thought "yeah this is definitely a good idea"?). But the elevator was cool. I liked that the Rock gave off very Han Soloy vibes for most of the film. I like his tourist cruise and his hustles.  What I didn't: This is the story of a trip on a river, but I think that the people who told the story do not know how rivers, or maybe water in general, work. For example the dilapidated boat is going upstream towa...